Shipmate
Thomas Dickson sent an email to me containing the following prose. I have been
reluctant in the past to post anything that I could not verify and post with proper
credits. Fortunately Thomas knew the author and we had him in our database of
658 shipmates. Dave Dickey has graciously given his permission for us to post
his poem on our site. Following is his response to my request along with his
poem, ÒThe CylinderÓ
Having spent many a
watch roaming the engineering spaces with a clipboard standing watch as the
"Auxiliary Electrician Aft" I got in the habit of sticking a few
extra sheets of paper in the clipboard and writing and reworking verses. I
don't remember the exact time frame, but I'm thinking that this poem, along
with several others, was created over the course of my 6th and 7th patrol,
about 1980. As I recall I wrote this out long hand in a green record book that
I left behind for posterity.
As I reread this
for the first time in over 20 years I have to agree that it is a bit dark and
cynical, but spending a patrol doing port and starboard watches in the
engineering spaces can do that to you. While I have to admit that there are
many good memories of my time at sea, it was not the boat that was the source
of them, it was the people I was with. The boat itself was just the cold hard
cylinder contained here and reading this takes me back to the somber reality
that was life under water.
The Cylinder
By Dave Dickey
USS Mariano Guadalupe Vallejo (SSBN-658)
I live inside a
cylinder a carcass made of steel
There is no world
outside of here, at least not one that's real
At times I can
deceive myself and think that it is true
There is a world
outside of here the sky it has it blue
But then the harsh
reality is forced into my head
There are no times
but here and now the other times are dead
I live inside a
cylinder the air is human made
The smell it has is
singular its memory will not fade
It smells of oil dirt
and sweat and laundry yet undone
And of its many
sufferers I too must count as one
More than a hundred
breathe this air I may be last in line
I pray to god that it
will last and breathe it one more time
I live inside a
cylinder surrounded yet alone
I weary at the
solitude and long to be at home
I'm glad I have no
family no wife and child to wait
And force them to
endure this life that I have grown to hate
But soon they say it
all will end our exile will be done
And just as soon I
will be back to make another run
I live inside a
cylinder hidden safely in the sea
The theory is they
bomb my home but still they don't kill me
Retaliation is our
task to kill the human race
When they bomb us we
bomb them the world's a burning waste
We wear a face of
virgin silk our death mask underneath
All trying to forget
the fact our job is to cause grief
I live inside a
cylinder machinery is lord
For they control my
destiny I heed their every word
They give me water
light and air and keep me safe and warm
And in return I work
on them, fix them when they alarm
On all this
technology my very life depends
The failure of most
any part could bring it to an end
I live inside a
cylinder with memory going blind
The things I knew
just yesterday are getting hard to find
I know there must be
other things outside these prison walls
The longer that I
stay inside the less I can recall
Like a dam that
started leaking my memory is drained
I hope that I can
leave this place with sanity retained
I live inside a
cylinder a prisoner of sorts
Sentenced into
solitary without benefit of courts
This is the perfect
prison here a hundred miles to sea
Two hundred feet
below the waves there's no such thing as free
It's said we need to
deter crime reduce the prison rolls
So send the offenders
out to sea to make deterrent patrols
I live inside a
cylinder or is it a sewer pipe
I've thrown three
years into this hole it's time to flush and wipe
The thanks you get
for jobs well done is just more work to do
But if you are
incompetent the opposite is true
In just three years
I've reached the top with nothing left to gain
And any more time I
spend here is just more down the drain
I live inside a
cylinder or maybe it's a cage
The keeper's playing
games outside to keep me in a rage
They feed me tidbits
now and then and keep me whipped in line
While I just sit by
quietly and try to bide my time
For one day soon my
time will come the odds are in my favor
They'd better get
their hits in now 'cause I won't be here later
I live inside a
cylinder I think sometimes perhaps
It's just a hollow
eggshell that is waiting to collapse
This bubble that I'm
riding has no eyes with which to see
We steer ourselves
with what we hear and maps which plot the sea
I hope this fragile
casing holds until I go elsewhere
'Cause any time you
roll the dice the house must take its share
I live inside a
cylinder a world that's self contained
Where everything is
made by man and nature is disdained
An artificial
universe processed and pasteurized
Where even air is
made by man and the food all comes freeze-dried
The lord has built of
earth and flesh but man just builds of steel
The world man built
does not compare with the other one that's real
I live inside a
cylinder a human sardine can
First they put
equipment in and then they added man
The only room there
was for men were several six foot cubes
So these were split
up into sixths one each among the crew
There's no such thing
as privacy and nothing can be hid
My space is but a
coffin with a curtain for a lid
I live inside a
cylinder where lives the two faced man
But when he smiles
and pats your back beware the other hand
One face he shows is
always kind complete benevolence
But when he sees you
turn your back it turns malevolent
Yet even when he
changes face a third is on the shelf
It is the one he
always serves the one that serves himself
I live inside a
cylinder no longer asking why
And suffer the
indignities without a tear to cry
My senses they have
all been dulled I find it hard to care
So I just block
emotions off behind a vacant stare
The choice to fight
or let it pass is best served by the latter
'Cause in the end
you'll always find it really doesn't matter
I live inside a
cylinder the newest of the fleet
The technology is
ancient, a prehistoric beast
Electronics from the
fifties the steam plant's World War II
Transistors are
uncommon with relays we make due
I thought
"Nuc" power would be new I've found it something other
Technology has passed
us by it's too late to recover
I live inside a
cylinder by name a submarine
We do our job beneath
the sea both silent and unseen
The multitudes cannot
conceive a life below the sea
The things they take
for granted are just memories to me
The few protect the
many the many soon forget
Alone inside a
cylinder the sentinel is set
used with permission